The Laws of Hunter
Многа букафф
1. Never fight a warrior that knows what he's doing.
2. Ignore the above if you know what you're doing.
3. You are a ninja at heart.
5. 4 does not exist.
6. 3 can be proved by sending your pet into a group of mobs, ninjaing whatever you please, then feigning death and mounting away.
7. Survival > Marksmanship.
8. Marksmanship > Beast Mastery.
9. Beast Mastery > Survival.
10. The above all make sense.
11. Feign death will always be resisted when you need it most.
12. Traps will always be resisted when you need them most.
13. Your pet will die when you need it most.
14. If all else fails, play dead.
15. The cake is a lie.
16. Pie > Cake.
17. Feed your pet Cake.
18. Feed it Pie too.
18. There are 2 #18s.
19. You are, have been, and always will be, the bane of everyone else.
20. 19 may not apply in certain situations.
21. You will never be nerfed dramatically, therefore everyone will always hate you.
22. Your friend's pet is better than yours.
23. 50% of the Hunter population does not exist. They are Huntards.
24. The Hunter next to you has better gear than you.
25. The Hunter next to you has a better talent build than you.
26. No matter how bad at your class you are, there is always someone worse than you.
27. There will always be more hunters than anyone else. These are called gold farmers.
28. Warriors, Warlocks, Shamans, Mages, Rogues, Priests, Druids, and Paladins will always win the roll for your loot.
29. The below statement is false.
30. The above statements are true.
31. Attacking a Beast Mastery Hunter is punishable by law. As in, he will lay down the law on you, for he is the lawgiver.
32. There are no trucks in World of Warcraft. So don't try to tame one.
33. Poop tipped arrows are ftw.
34. Expose Weakness will always go off when the mob dies.
35. Improved Aspect of the Hawk will always go off when the mob dies.
36. You will run out of arrows / bullets in the middle of a raid, and if you are an engineer you will have forgotten your field repair bot.
37. Mongoose bite will never be useful.
38. Aimed Shot will always be overpowered.
39. Aspect of the Viper will always be underpowered.
40. Pets will always suck.
41. There are no Hunter-Hunter 2v2s above 1300. All that break this law shall be mauled by a Beast Mastery Hunter.
42. This is the ultimate answer.
43. Misdirection will always be used to wipe instances.
44. If Rogues do it from behind, Hunters do it from 30 yards away.
45. Hunters do not have an IWIN button.
46. Ignore 45 if you are specced Beast Mastery.
47. You will never have the best pet.
48. This is law #48. Learn it.
49. Survival may or may not exist depending on your religion.
50. I am not held responsible in the event any of these laws fails to uphold.
51. Brag about damage in BGs.
52. Brag about arena ratings.
53. Do not brag, for you are ezmode.
54. 53 only applies when in the company of a mage.
55. You must always record a misdirection wipe.
56. Hunters CAN use the Twin Blades of Azzinoth.
57. This is NOT the final law.
58. Misdirection was made specifically for Gnomes. In fact, Horde can misdirect them too.
59. Only kite in battlegrounds.
60. Also kite if your pet dies.
61. If you have to kite you should have feigned by now.
62. The real legendary hunter weapon is the Portal Gun.
63. Respect GLaDOS and its cake.
64. The Weighted Companion Cube is your friend.
65. The Cow Level is a myth.
66. Thori'dal is a myth.
67. Remember, EVERYTHING is a HUNTAR WEAPON. Including Gnomes.
68. Scout is awesome.
69. To tame a dragon, bonk da kitty onna head.
70. Kiting is when a hunter takes something big and angry to someplace soft and unsuspecting.
71. Kiting isn't cheating, it's creative use of game mechanics.
72. Cheating is always considered creative use of game mechanics.
73. Beast Mastery will always be the GG spec.
74. Concussive barrage will always be useless.
75. Aimed shot will miss when you need it most.
76. Improved Feign Death will never be removed.
77. Do the truffle shuffle.
78. Hunters will always win.
79. Hunters will always lose.
80. Hunters will always lose to rogues.
81. EVERYONE hates rogues.
82. If the above don't make sense too bad.
83. All hunters are either Night Elves or Blood Elves. All of them.
84. Hunters are not OP, you just suck.
85. Don't weave aimed shot in your rotation. Seriously.
86. But who needs a shot rotation?
87. We suck in arena because of Kalgan.
89. We are paper. Kalgan is scissors. Warlocks are mushroom.
90. Aggro does not exist, only bad tanks.
91. If there is in fact a bad tank, it is blamed on the Hunter.
92. Everything is blamed on the Hunter.
93. If somehow it is not blamed on the Hunter, it is blamed on the pet.
94. You will always serpent sting the mob that is supposed to be CCed.
95. This will wipe the party.
96. Obviously, you be blamed.
97. 92 is so true that you will be blamed for the Warlock DoTing your trap target.
98. Ask for Salv, then say you don't have enough mana.
99. Ask for Wisdom, then say you keep pulling aggro.
100. Hunters suck in arena. It is a fact of Hunter. And these are the Laws of Hunter.
101. These Laws were continued due to popular demand, whether you like it or not. Have a nice day.
102. Someone shall kill your pet, you shall rez it, and said pet shall kill that guy.
103. All classes are our enemies. Especially pillars.
104. Free action potions were made just for Hunters.
105. Even as you are reading this, 17 people are rerolling from Hunter due to arena.
106. So many Hunters reroll that Hunters will get an ability called Reroll in WotLK.
107. Everyone knows that no class is broken, they are all working as intended.
108. If you do not care what people think roll Night Elf.
109. If you want to use a class with any sense you should have rolled Warlock.
110. Remember, everyone hates rogues. Everyone. EVERYONE.
111. Thori'dal will drop, and the non-hunter master looter will get it and flee the server.
112. Whenever you see a squishie you will use all CDs, immediately cast aimed shot and pray to Chuck Norris that it crits.
113. Warlocks will always try to spam fear once you use BW.
114. Hunters spend more money on arrows and pet food than their epic flying mount.
115. Bacon.
116. Hunters will never get stealth.
117. Pets will never be buffed.
118. Kalgan will never be fired.
119. We will never get a good looking tier helmet again.
120. Everyone will always hate hunters for no apparent reason. If you disagree that's your problem.
121. Hunter itemization is decided by a 3 year old.
122. Said 3 year old also decides everything else about Hunters.
123. Thori'dal will never drop with a Hunter in the party.
124. If somehow it does drop with a Hunter in the party the warrior will get it.
125. No one will care if the above happens, but when the Hunter gets the Blades of Azzinoth he will be kicked from the guild.
126. There is no such thing as a good Hunter, only a cheater.
127. There is no such thing as a bad Hunter, only a huntard.
128. Survival is NOT dead.
129. Hunters will never get a new stable slot.
130. There is no Cow Level.
131. Where the fk IS Ollie?
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